Written by: Allison Gilmore, MBA, COE, CPC, ELI-MP
Have you ever heard the parable of the two wolves?
It is a Cherokee story about a boy and his grandfather, who are talking about the struggle that lives within each of us. The grandfather explains that there are two wolves inside us all — one is good, filled with harmony, light, and compassion; the other is bad, filled with anger, greed, and hate.
The boy thinks for a moment and then asks, “Which wolf wins?”
The grandfather simply replies, “The one I feed.”
Although this is a loose retelling of the parable, it carries timeless truth. Each of us has the capacity for kindness, hope, and empathy, as well as selfishness, jealousy, and anger. Which of these we nurture determines how we show up in the world.
Feeding the Right Wolf as a Leader
As leaders – in our organizations, families, and communities – we set the tone for those around us. The question is not just which wolf am I feeding, but also, which wolf am I showing others to feed?
It is not about grand gestures or one-time choices. It is about the small, consistent ways we show up each day. When we align passion and purpose with our daily actions, we feed the right wolf. In doing so, we create a legacy rooted not just in outcomes, but in who we are.
Reflection Questions for Leaders
Ask yourself — which wolf am I feeding today?
The Wolf of Light:
- Do I respond with grace and empathy?
- Do I show kindness by being clear in my communication?
- Do I assume positive intent before knowing the full story?
- Do I create safe space for open dialogue and differing opinions?
- Do I react with humility, knowing I can always learn?
- Do I lead with respect, even in disagreement?
- Do I speak about others with integrity — even behind closed doors?
- Do I listen actively, without judgment?
- Do I see challenges as opportunities to grow?
The Wolf of Darkness:
- Do I assume the worst before seeking the truth?
- Do I hoard information or share only the bare minimum?
- Do I gossip or speak poorly of others when they’re not around?
- Do I shut people down when they challenge me?
- Do I micromanage, showing I don’t trust my team?
- Do I deflect accountability when things go wrong?
- Do I take credit for others’ ideas?
- Do I criticize more than I encourage?
Legacy Starts Within
Our legacy is not defined only by the visible decisions we make, but by the quiet, unseen choices we make every day, especially when no one is watching.
It begins with conviction; who we are at our core. When our mindset and values guide us, they help us feed the right wolf consistently. And when we do that, we not only strengthen ourselves, but also inspire others to do the same.
Ultimately, leadership is not just about making the right decisions. It is about becoming the kind of person who makes them naturally — because we have chosen, day after day, to feed the right wolf.
Ready to Feed the Right Wolf in Your Leadership?
True growth starts with awareness, and intentional action. Coaching provides the space to reflect, reset, and realign your leadership mindset so you can lead with clarity, compassion, and purpose.
If you are ready to strengthen your leadership from the inside out, I would love to help you discover how you feed the right wolf in your own life.
You can schedule a discovery call here: https://calendly.com/allison-mindset/coaching-discovery-call
Let’s work together to build a legacy of leadership that lasts … one intentional choice at a time.